Are You Even On Your To-do List?

They say a woman’s work is never done.
You don't have to picture this, you're probably living it. A madly busy work schedule.
Plus trying to balance all the other areas of your life.
Does this leave you feeling like you are spinning too many plates in the air at once?

With all that we do because we are moms and wives there never seems to be enough time to think about, never mind actually meet, our own needs or desires.
Can I get an Amen?

Yup, managing kids, working, grocery shopping, balancing family, ferrying to extra mural activities (oh wait that's off the cards thanks to Lockdown) means that we are putting ourselves at the bottom of the pile.

And what happens?
It can lead to us experiencing depression, anxiety, or a general feeling that you are worn out.
Besides how it affects us, worn out also means that your performance and attentiveness to all you have to do will suffer.

And you know what else?
Irritation becomes common.
Because we are overwhelmed and unable to deal with the stressors of the day.

When I was thinking about starting out in health coaching this is what I wanted to help women with. 
To get out from under this heavy blanket of "I must look after everyone else in order to have happiness in my life".
NO!

You aren't going to be happy until you are happy.
And what will make you happy is looking after yourself.

If you don't look after yourself there are a few things that are going to happen right away.
1) Irritable and moody will be your normal
2) Your family life will become affected
3) Your relationship with your other half will be impacted
4) Your Self will spiral into a negative pool of choices and rationalizations that will knock you down further

Learn to Say No in the Nicest Way
No, means setting boundaries and limiting what you will or are willing to do in a single day or week.

This may mean having to say no to some things, but considering how much your mental health matters, it may be well worth it.

10 Ways to Say No Nicely
1) I'm honoured but I can't
2) I wish there were two of me
3) Unfortunately, I've already committed to doing... 
4) Sorry, maybe next time...
5) Can I think about it and get back to you?
6) I can't put anything else on my calendar at this point
7) I'm not able to right now but have you thought of...
8) I can't do that today, how about...
9) That sounds great, it's just that...
10) My head says yes but my heart says no.

Just saying NO in the nicest way will free up your time.

Make a date and stick to it
Once a week, take time to do the things you like to do alone.
Before Lockdown was our new normal, every Wednesday I would take myself off for lunch at a local coffee shop.
I'd haul out my workbook, make notes, listen to a podcast, and enjoy my large cup of tea and quiche with salad. 

The times that I didn't go for lunch on Wednesday, I regretted not having that time.
It was my time, with no interruptions or demands. 

To do this you need to learn to say no to the people in your life or learn to ask for help (mainly talking childcare here, ladies!).

This will help you to have some time to relax.

Go and grab a drink somewhere, get some exercise, or even just disappear to another part of the house.
I have been known to take my duvet and pillows to lie in the bath!!!!
 Anything you can think of to do that would enable you to free up space in that busy head of yours.

And once you have the free space?
What then? 
Close your eyes and just let the thoughts come and go.
Or write all your thoughts down as they come and go.
Or be in the moment of sipping your tea. 

Now it's your turn - let me know what you do for YOU. How often do you take time for yourself?
Come on over to my Facebook Group - Being Healthy Made Simple and join the conversation.